Kiss, Bow or Shake Hands?

Some general guidelines on greetings and terms of address

By Terri Morrison
© Copyright 2004, All Rights Reserved



Physical greetings
Businessmen in the United States and Britain rarely have to endure a kiss on each cheek from another man. Even in countries where such greetings are common (Italy and Russia, for example), a kiss is generally reserved for relatives or good friends. A foreign businessman will have to do a lot of relationship-building to reach the point at which he is greeted with a kiss. When that happens, the easiest thing to do is to stay still and let the kiss-initiating person move his head. Otherwise your noses may collide!

In Asia, Westerners rarely master all the intricacies of a bow. The basics usually suffice: bow from the waist, and the person with the lower status bows more deeply. When greeting Westerners, many Asians follow a bow with a handshake.

As any politician can attest, strong handshakes can hurt. North Americans and Australians should moderate their strong handshakes overseas. Many Asians who do shake hands actually perform a hand-clasp, with no pressure and very little pumping. To give emphasis to a handshake, it is permissible for each person to place their left hand over their clasped hands.

Forms of address
There are very few countries in which businesspeople address each other by first names after a short time. In Germany and Switzerland, for example, even longstanding business partners may choose to address each other by their surnames. North Americans commonly use first names, and are notorious for losing credibility by using first names overseas.

Degrees of politeness
Some Asian languages have several degrees of politeness. To know which level to use, Asians need to know their counterpart's standing in society. Hence they often ask very personal questions of foreigners, such as how much they earn or how many employees they supervise, to determine the level of politeness required. If you find such questions too personal, simply decline to answer, or say that it is not something that is usually discussed in your culture.