Conversational Mistakes

By Terri Morrison
© Copyright 2004, All Rights Reserved

Most of us think we know a "Yes" from a "No." But if you’re crossing some multi-lingual lines, even basic communications can take a wrong turn. For example, the senior vice president of a North American textile manufacturing plant was responding to a series of questions from a team of Japanese buyers. The meeting was supposed to have been a rather ceremonial one—simply review some final questions and close the deal. After each inquiry from the Japanese managers, the executive replied, "No problem." The demeanor of the Japanese team became progressively more formal with each answer, until finally, the senior Japanese manager abruptly closed his notes, picked up the cards and stood. Startled, the executive asked if everything was all right. The junior Japanese managers then started explaining that they were all surprised at the difficulties with the heretofore agreed-upon negotiating points. Unfortunately, every time the North American had responded to a question with, "No problem," what the Japanese heard was "No, there’s a problem."

Even holding conversations in the same language can be difficult. Dialects, accents, local jargon and acronyms can wreak havoc with lines of communication. George Bernard Shaw’s famous phrase, "England and America are two countries divided by a common language," sums up the varieties of interpretations that English speakers can encounter amongst themselves. Conversational mistakes happen every day, at every place of business. Like the conversational faux pas that occurred in London when a female U.S. executive complimented an English associate on his unique and attractive suspenders. The distinguished attendees at the meeting were somewhat taken aback, because to the English, suspenders are stretchy garters that hold up women’s stockings. The proper term for the attire she was admiring was "braces."

Beyond specific one-word translation issues, there are many inquiries that should not be posed in different societies. See if you can match the controversial question with its respective country.

A)	This is delicious! May I have the recipe?	1)	Japan
B)	How’s your wife?	2)	Saudi Arabia
C)	May I call you Aki?	3)	China
D)	May I have a fork?	4)	Argentina, Chile, South Korea, etc…

Answers:

A is 4
From Argentina to South Korea, if you are invited to eat in a business associates’ elegant home, it is probably impolite to ask the hostess for a recipe. The odds are that she did not cook the meal, a servant did. By asking this question, you may be implying that she is involved in manual labor. Wealthy families in many countries generally employ help, and levels of society may be distinctly delineated.

B is 2
Never ask about the female members of a devout Muslim’s family.

C is 1
While most Japanese executives will acquiesce to your request, they are doing so because you are a foreigner. It would be most impolite in Japan, Korea and many other Asian cultures to call a senior person by his or her first name. Honorifics are important, and titles can even replace names completely. Mr. Tsutsui, a teacher, would just be called, "Teacher."

D is 3
Learn to use chopsticks. Your special request may embarrass your hosts, particularly if they do not have the utensil you wanted.

Obviously, discretion is the better part of valor in many circumstances. But knowing what topics and questions are appropriate in multiple cultures can be complex. Often, sports can be a winner in both business and social circles. But not everyone is interested in NASCAR, sailing or soccer, so pick your sport from the local, popular environment, and always make positive comments about the home team. Combining knowledge of your hosts’ culture with a sense of what topics should be avoided will help you communicate effectively with everyone from convivial Frenchmen to laconic Finns.

Excerpted from OAG Frequent Flyer, September 10, 2003